If I was King of the World

So let’s pretend I was King of the World. One day, the people’s representative comes to me with a problem
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Random tomfoolery

Farewell emails in this recession era are one of those things where people have gotten bitten by technology they don’t fully understand. First of all, why, oh why do companies give there employees the ability to send globally in the first place? As a rule of thumb, if you can’t remember the name of every employee in your place of work, this probably should not be allowed. Even so, if you’ve managed to accumulate a large address book list, or have many mailing groups you can send to, you can still hit a lot of people with your bridge burning flame fest, or your eloquent touching ‘so long and thanks for all the fish’. Personally, I don’t think it’s worth it to go for the scathing flame thrower email – you never know when that might come back to burn you (ouch!).

Speaking of recession, “What recession?”, I ask. Home Despot is out of stock on battery operated smoke detectors. The smoke detector shortage, according to one Despot worker, is due to landlords buying them all up after a basement suite fire that resulted in deaths to occupants where said equipment may have been lacking. Everyone seems to be fixing there toilet for some reason, I bough out the last flapper valves, and lots of other items are missing. I have no idea why these are out, the Fed tax credit don’t kick in until you hit a thou, (grasping at straws) perhaps there is a rash of toilet thievery going on – I arrived home on Friday night to find my place broken into. Gone was Six DVD sets, toothpaste, and (wait for it) my downstairs bathroom toilet paper. The thief had discerning, er, taste too only going for the good stuff, and leaving the generic backup stuff behind. Even took the roll on the spool. So, perhaps it’s going to the next level and thieves are stealing toilet parts to kick start plumping businesses. Plumper kickbacks anyone?

Coming back to “What recession?” I note that it is also still stupid busy in a lot of restaurants out there. Swans PubThere seems to be so much excess money to burn in Calgary that it’s taking awhile for the current money pile to smolder down to ash before we notice the downturn. I’m hearing rumblings on the work front about opportunities being way thinner now than a year ago, so it’s coming. Frankly, if you have a good stable job a recession is a great time. Line ups in stores disappear. Fancy restaurants always have an open table for you. Staff are actually available to help you in a store. Parking spaces can be had for less than a king’s ransom. You can hire a contractor, this month, not ‘sometime next year’. Incompetent idjits get fired from your workplace. So, it’s all good, as long as you have a job.

At least “Swan’s” in Inglewood is still not too busy. One of the few genuine pubs in town that doesn’t try to also be a sports bar on “Flames nights”, so I can actually go there with friends and expect to chat all evening, rather than having to yell over the game volume. Probably my favorite outing place in town right now – good food, good service, fair price, and some of the colorful character you would expect out of Inglewood, so don’t bring the kids. Oh, they know how to pour a Guinness. ’nuff said.

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Really Good Tiki Bar TV interview with the Doctor

Check out this interview with Jeff Macpherson, creator and the Doctor in Tiki Bar TV. Lots of interesting stuff I didn’t know about the show. Nice to see one of my favorite podcasts starting to figure out how to make money. He points out something interesting in that it’s hard to hire people to edit a show that has a non-conventional format. One of the things you’ll note after you’ve watched a few episodes is that “mistakes” are included as part of the episode. It’s part of the charm in the show, the “we don’t take ourselves so seereeouslee, so just watch and have fun with us”. Try finding an editor to edit that.

Also, interesting to see the road they are going down trying to make money doing a show on the internet. Advertising, sure – now I know why they don’t have a liquor advertiser – the lawyers don’t want them advertising on a show that has *actual drinking*. Go figure. Also it seems traditional media producers don’t get this “podcast” thing. Not surprising – they will fall soon because of that, among other things. At least the Tiki Bar guys have been making money on merchandise in the meanwhile, here’s hoping they can figure out an advertising model that doesn’t drive the audence (and me) away.

Looking forward to the new season on the high seas!

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Prediction for 2009: Duke Nukem Forever will finally be released!

Alright, you might be thinking ‘wtf is he smoking?’ or ‘wtf is Duke Nukem?’, if you’re young enough. That second part is scary. It has been well over TEN YEARS since the original Duke Nukem 3D was released. It was a heady time for first person shooters – Duke 3D and Quake were released in 1996 and they totally blew away DOOM, which could be argued to have popularized the genera in the first place.

Duke Nukem was much favored by me over Quake. Sure, Quake had a more realistic 3D engine, but Duke had *personality*. The sound track rocked. There was humor. Quake had several sequels released – what happened to the Duke?

I spent several years waiting – having played Quake, then Quake II and still finding them lacking in the fun that was Duke. Eventually, I gave up on a sequel to Duke Nukem 3D, having come to the conclusion that due to perpetual changes in the game, the Duke was relegated to being perpetual vaporware.

The today I was reading the Wikipedia article – what got me interested is that there is video of Jace Hall playing through a level – plus the 3D Realms website has been slowly starting to update with greater frequency and more detail on the game, which leads me to believe they might actually be serious about releasing this puppy some time soon when it’s done.

Oh, and screenshots have been appearing:
DNF screen shote sept 2008
a sure sign that *something* has been coded to produce said screen shot. Oh, and from the FAQ sec.1.13 for DNF, they state that they do not plan to release any new game shots until right before the game is released. Hmmm. First screen images released in Sept ’08. Considering how long development has been, I’ll take any release in ’09!

Alright, I admit, this is a bit of a long shot for a prediction, but If I’m right, I’ll look like an ef’n genius.

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My Style of Webcomics

I don’t know why I’m not big into the Calgary comic expo, because I do like comics. I attended in 2008, and mostly went for the SF BSG, and ST:TOS guests. But for the comic part of the convention? Meh. I suppose a lot of it has to do with comics focusing so much on super heroes and manga, both of which I’m not that interested in. I classify myself as interested in “other” or “Sunday Funnys” comics, which, at least the Calgary convention, does not pay much attention to. So, being the holidays, and being that you might just possibly have some free time to peruse the funny pages, I give you my list of comics that I follow on a regular basis:

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Shamwow humour

I got to wondering about those Shamwow things they advertise on TV. You can watch the ad online in case you never watch TV, or you can take my word that it’s a rag that’s supposed to have some amazing absorbing properties. Do they actually work something like advertised? So I go do a little Google search and come up with infomercialratings.com, with consumer reviews of the said Shamwow product.

WARNING – I am about to do something I despise on the internet – post images of text. I’m just a data whore tonight.
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iTease

And so it begins:

We will let you know by email after each item in your order ships. If you ordered multiple items, you may receive separate shipments with no additional shipping charges.

I had just ordered a Mac mini to be the first component in what will ultimately be my new multimedia entertainment system, plus a wireless Apple mouse and keyboard. I ordered the keyboard mouse despite some misgivings about the quality of the keyboard versus the price, but the old school techie in me still thinks that you can’t have an IBM keyboard touch a Mac device (the Mac would be dirtied). I *know* better, but sometimes emotions will cloud the judgment of even the most die-hard spec-comparing-component-configuring- geek. Who am I kidding – geeks are just as ruled by emotion as anyone else. I wanted a “pure” Apple system, and by Jobs, I was going to have one!

Sure enough, as the order acknowledgment warned, my keyboard and mouse showed up this last week, a good week before my Mac mini (base model, with 1GB RAM upgrade for you scccg’s out there).

Now, you have to understand where this next part comes from. I’ve always liked Apple computers. The first computer I ever used was a black Apple ][. When I was young I wanted an Apple ][, //, //e, //c; I was really close to buying one until my Dad offered to pay for 1/2 a computer because he needed one to help run his business. You can guess what we ended up with. When I grew up and had to use computers for a living, I always wanted to buy an Apple computer, but could never justify the extra cost of a Mac, especially for something that wasn’t mainstream for the kind of computing I was doing – games, spreadsheets, and databases. Now, finally, I have both a reason and enough spare income to justify this little extravagance – I mean, it’s going to be mostly to watch bitto- I mean legally downloaded videos and streaming stuff off of the ‘net upstairs away from my “work” computer.

So, I’m just a little bit like a kid opening a Christmas present, my first Apple component of my very own. First the box it came in was *light*. We are talking so light I was wondering if Apple just shipped me an empty box to fuck with my mind. I open the box. Inside are two iWhite smaller boxes, that also feel like empty boxes that Apple shipped to me to fuck with my mind. I start with what would be the mouse. Lo – a mouse is inside! Part of the reason it’s so light is that it comes with Lithium AA’s – should last a long time, and feel like they’d float away compared to regular AA’s. The mouse iWhite, with that understated design that just looks like something organic. It feels pretty good to click, the whole mouse actually pivots forward when you click, so I have no idea how it picks up left vs. right click. I’ll need to use it to actually see how good it is.

There actually was a keyboard in the box that looked like it might hold a keyboard. I wasn’t sure at the time because the box was so darn small, and you guessed it, so is the keyboard. It was one of those times where shopping online just doesn’t prepare you for what you are getting. Yes, I saw a picture of it from the top and poo-pooed the chicklet looking keyboard, saw the side profile and went, oh it’s kind of thin, but I didn’t actually look at the dimensions. My first reaction was ‘holy crap – it’s small!!!” Oh, and if you didn’t guess, it’s light too. It’s a solid little sucker, being made of actual anodized aluminum frame, and iWhite chicklet keys. I’m not expecting to actually have to type more that www.blahblahblah.com on this thing, so I wasn’t too worried about the feel, but it’s actually pretty good, not the full travel of a real keyboard, but pretty good feed back, an actually a bit clicky versus mushy. Also none of this binding you get with some cheap keyboards if you don’t hit the keys right on the center. Oh, when I say it’s small, the keys are not small, it just doesn’t take up any more space that it has to for a query set of keys and a set of function keys on the top plus the option / modifier keys on the bottom. I opened up the battery component and was again impressed with the solidness of the components. Apple started with a solid piece of round steel bolt for the battery cover, then machined out the grooves and the tensioned ball bearings that keep the cover in place. I showed the thing to my Dad, and even he said, “oh yah, dat is very nice”. So if an old German thinks it’s solid, it’s *solid* let me tell you. It’s very pretty too, the shiny anodized aluminum with the white keys looks very stylish. But I’m a sucker for solid simple design too.

So after having played with this thing for about ten minutes, I got to the next stage: lets fire this wireless puppy up and connect it to the iMac… Drat. I want to play with this thing – it’s not just a tool that sometimes gets in the way of getting stuff done – this actually might be *fun* to use, something I haven’t really felt for some time with computers now.

I can feel my Mac weenie growing already.

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From simple ideas come great things

So I was browsing Digg thinking again how lame most of the submissions are when I run across this:

He Took a Polaroid Every Day, Until the Day He Died

This is a brilliant post about a brilliant find on the internet: A guy who took a Polaroid every day, shooting something in his life. The blog entry explains it way better than I ever could.

Take a look at all the pictures, here.

Some I like:
having fun foot cancer self portrait

That’s all I dare do right now. The site is slowing to a crawl in it’s popularity.

It’s raw, kinda unpolished, but it’s beta; wasn’t really ready for public viewing. As of today it’s hugely mainstream. I see the Digg article is well over 7000 diggs, at this rate it’s going to be one of the most popular articles of the year. Reading some of the project blog pages this thing is getting media attention of all sorts.

I’m trying to put a finger on why this touches a nerve with so many people. I found myself going through the pictures going “let’s see what he was doing in ’88 when I was in university” or checking on random sets every few years to see how his style changed.

It’s his end though that gets ‘ya. He’s got cancer and having to deal with death at the doorstep. He gets engaged, and married two days later. Only 20 days later we see his last picture.

I have to say, it is interesting to see the story that thousands of photos can tell versus thousands of words.

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Some Hang Drum Music to mellow out to

This is a cool piece of muzac played on a “Hang” (Wiki for more details) Interesting music on an interesting instrument.

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Watch these commercials and BLOW YOUR MIND!

I saw this one on Diggnation, and was most impressed by the claim that with Powerthrist you’ll have 400 babies that will run like Kenyans if also fed Powerthirst

aaaand then there’s the second video, from which I now know that if God gives you lemons you FIND A NEW GOD!!!

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